Thank you all so much for your love and compassion. The funeral was yesterday and it was a hard day. My aunt spoke as well as my brother and they truly did her justice. The amount of people there was overwhelming. There was overflow in the overflow room. The chapel held 150 and there was probably another 30-50 people. I’m so glad so many people came and it was a testament to what an amazing woman my mother truly was. The minister was fantastic too, she really understood the person my mother was, which in turn helped everyone else understand her too.
I am so overwhelmed with the outpouring of cards and e-mails I have received. I have never felt so loved in all my life. It’s now time to start rebuilding my life without my mom. The hardest times will be my wedding and the birth of what would have been her grandchildren. It is a tragedy that they will be missing out on a woman who would have made such a difference in their lives.
Thanks again for all your prayers and warm thoughts and hugs everyone. I read the messages you left on the guestbook online and I smiled and knew you were all thinking of me.
[B]Ann:[/B] I am glad that your mother had a good turnout and that there were a lot of people there to help share your grief with you. From experience I know that it does make it easier. My mother died April 7th, 2002 and then my Dad followed her on July 2nd, 2002. It was a very hard year. If you ever need to talk, I am here for you.
As to your wedding, here’s what I did. The pew where my parents would have sat was kept empty. When I walked up the aisle I had two long stemmed red roses tucked behind my bouquet. When I got to the top of the aisle, I handed my bouquet to my maid of honour, turned, kissed each rose and then layed it on the seat where my father and my mother would have been sitting, had they been alive. I had the minister include my parents in her sermon at the beginning of the service. DH’s parents did not attend because his mother was very ill, so he did the same thing with his parents that I had done with mine and the minister included them as well. It made it feel like they were there watching, although it was a bit hard to do. I would not ignore them and wanted them included in some way. This worked for me!
As for her grandchildren, they [B]ARE[/B] her grandchildren whether she is in this world or in Heaven. You can keep her alive in memories by showing the children pictures of her and telling them little stories of when you were growing up, so that they come to “know” her almost as much as you did!
Be kind to yourself and keep eating and taking care of yourself. Get some rest. Some funeral parlours offer grief counselling. You do not have to have used their services to be entitled to the counselling. It is free. Call around and see if you can find a parlour where this is offered. It does help!
Hugs to you my friend.
[B]Ann[/B]: It is good to see you here again. I was glad to hear that so many people were there to celebrate your mother’s life. Now you must take the time to relax and grieve in your own way but your mother will always be part of your life.
My father passed away suddenly at the age of 49, when I was just 18. I missed him greatly on my wedding day, so I know how you feel. My mother died 18 years ago, I can’t believe it has been that long and I still think about her a lot, but time is a great healer. Take care of yourself and visit with us when you feel up to it.
Here is my latest doll outfit. Another senior moment, I had forgotten I already had this doll. She is nicer looking than the charity store one.
Ann, take it easy and take time to relax and grieve. The first days, untill the funeral are crazy, now you only have to think about you. Extra hugs and take care 
Sue, that’s a great doll-outfit.
Ann, it’s so good to see you here! As everyone else has said, take care of yourself, and know that we are thinking of you and praying for you.
Sue, what a cute doll outfit! 
[B]Sue:[/B] That is a really cute outfit. This doll is going to be better dressed than you are! Great work!
Hi Ann Thank you for checking in with us. Like others have said take care and give yourself time. Sounds like your mom was a wonderful person and touched may lives. 
Sue~The doll clothes look great! What pretty colors and beautiful knitting!
Ann~Tears in my eyes reading your post. So sorry that you are dealing with this at such a young age. Take care
Ann I too had tears in my eyes, and running down my cheek reading your post. Glad there was such a big turnout.
I have to say that Christine’s idea of the roses at your wedding would be a great idea!
Sue that doll is so cute!
Christine I can’t wait to see the pics, glad to hear you’re making some nice socks! Gladyou got so far without your neck hurting you.
Still only have 1 bunny complete & another 1 started. Hard to work on them only when the kids aren’t around-they’re always around.
OK mommies out there; Jacob is going to spend the night at his buddy’s house tomorrow night & I’m freaking out - I trust the parents and dont have any fears about any of that, just not liking the idea of him sleeping away from home. Any advice? words of wisdom? etc???
Ann I agree with the others, tears here too. Know that your in my prayers and we are here for you
Julie~Is he kinda nervous or just you? :teehee: I remember Isaiah’s first night at Jackson’s :teehee:…Let him know that he can call you at ANY time if he gets worried or nervous…make sure he packs his favorite sleeping buddy if he has one or favorite toy…I think Isaiah was more worried about leaving me than himself so I told him yes mommy will miss you, but it will be ok…your gonna be ok 
Sue~That is too cute!! 
I love Christine’s idea about the roses! Christine, I may suggest that to my cousin Kelli, who lost her dad in a hunting accident a couple of years ago. Her other plan I know is to play a recording they have from when he sang at another cousin’s wedding the year before. So even though he can’t be there, he will be a part of it. I don’t know if there is any way to do something similar for your mother, but something to consider.
Videos and stories are a great way to bring your mother into your children’s lives. I was fortunate enough to meet all of my grandparents (with 3 of them still living), but my Grandpa Bennett died when I was pretty young so I don’t remember him too well. There are a few things that I have that represent important memories from when he was in my life (my most treasured possession is the Field Guide to Birds we read every time I saw him, and when he died Grandma decided that it could not possibly be anyone’s but mine) but mostly I know him from my dad’s stories. The moments in my life when I know my dad is most proud of me is when he says (in the certain tone he gets when he talks about Grandpa), “Your Grandpa would be proud of you today.”
You can give your kids their grandma, even though it might only be stories and pictures.
Ann, you’re so precious and I’m glad you told us about the funeral. It must have been a hard day. We’re here for you, so keep us posted on how you’re doing and what we can do to help, okay? Your mom sounds like an amazing woman. You are lucky to have been raised by her!
Karina, at least Ron will have his studies to keep him occupied!
Dustina, the thumbs look SO FANTASTIC! I would have done a solid color, but NO! you have to go and make it all fancy!!! :cheering: Glad your GD is doing okay. Tell him that water keeps your kidneys functioning. Not enough and the stuff they filter isn’t diluted enough and they have to work harder. Right, nurse Julie?
Lieke, glad your neck is getting better. Mine hurts now! Here, you can get the cervical collar at the pharmacy or drug store, but not all stores carry ones that fit right. I had to do some looking. I don’t know about the stores in the NL.
Christine, can’t wait to see pics of the socks! I’ve had PTAs do stuff they shouldn’t, too. Glad you said something.
Lisa, I’m amazed that people are still spending money like that! We won’t be!
Carey, hope Emily is feeling better. I always get afraid of meningitis when kids have sore necks!
Sue, your skills are impressive!
Julie, don’t show your freak, friend! If you get all freaked out, he’ll get scared and wonder why. Breathe deeply and encourage him to enjoy himself, to mind his manners and be a good boy. If he needs you, he can call, but he’s a big boy and will have fun! ANd then enjoy some knitting time!
I’m almost done with MIL’s sleeves. YAY! I had lots of knit time at work today!:cheering:
I just received two beautiful cards in the mail. Christine sent me a lovely card with a beautiful poem inside and Sue made me a gorgeous card as well. Thank you both!
morning,
Ann, take care.
Christine - my heart’s sorrow when i read your post, . i like the idea, and hope this will help Ann’s.
Lieke - Feeling better today ?
Julie - the kids here dont have a sleepover thing, i m sure the kids will enjoy very much in each other house. I think it is U who is nervous (just like me when Jayne has her first school camping last year, remember? U guys gave me those nice words to calm my nervous…i will always remember those nice gesture from all of u)
Dustina - i love reading in your blog about Isaiah and Jackson. I bet they will grow up as to be buddies.
Gina - :cheering: for the knit time.
Sue - i cant see the pic too, bet it gonna be a cute one.
thanks guys, I dont think he’s nervous, but I am. He’s only spent the night away from me when I’ve had to spend some nights in the hospital. He will just be 5 on April 12th so he still seems like a baby to me. THanks for all the kind words; wonder if he’ll make it all night long? Hope he doesn’t get to homesick, they’re about 20 min away from us.
Ann glad you’re doing well. I just sent you a little card today too; didn’t know how much postage was to Canada so had to go to the post office. please let me know when you get it. Sorry it’s so late.
Holy CRAP I’m having one of those days. I just knocked my textbook across my keyboard and inverted my computer screen, had a mini panic attack at the thought of finishing my homework upside down (I can read upside down but directions were all reversed too) but fortunately, I knew that the book hit only a certain area of the keyboard and the most likely culprits are Ctrl, Alt, something… so I fixed it.
Julie, I’m sure he’ll be fine. My first couple of slumber parties ended disastrously, but that was a particular case of my having a very hot temper as a kid, and a 2 hour tolerance of other people. I was never homesick or nervous (well, except that after the first sleepover I was scared of causing trouble again… despite the eight years between). My brother couldn’t do sleepovers as a kid, at least not without dad going with (like to scout camp), but he did fine at grandparents’ homes, even when he was quite little… except when his mean, nasty older sister told him stories about wild animals…
I’m going to visit my friend Brenna in Indiana next weekend, and since nobody wants to go with me I have to brave driving I80 through Chicago by myself. I wish at least one of my friends was free, so I could have some backup for this experience (and also one of my biggest fears is that my friends are just “friends” and don’t ACTUALLY want to be around me… so if I’m not constantly on my toes I start to fall back into anxiety about that, too). Choices? Circumnavigate Chi-town and spend extra hours on the road, or brave city traffic (just one straight shot on the interstate…) and hopefully cut out some time.
In other news, I wrote an article for the blog Dining Hall Digest, which belongs to NY Mike and he says “Share the link with everyone!” I don’t know who might care, but the blog is about college dining in all of its various forms… mostly from his school but obviously now a little from mine, too! http://dininghalldigest.blogspot.com/ I tried to be a little bit humorous… it’s not a bad article, if I do say so myself! Also, I feel kind of famous because now people at Mike’s school know who I am and stuff! lol.
Good morning all,
Julie, he will be fine. Just make sure he knows he can come home at any time.
Jess, how on earth did you manage to get your computer screen inverted? I’ve had some pretty weird things with my pc, but never an inverted screen. Usually, when my computer is wacky, I just reboot it. Usually works…
Well, I’m at University today, fighting with SPSS again. I’ve planned on finishing the result-section today, but I’ve only got 2 about 2 hours left until I meet with my friend. I kind of overslept :oops:. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to finish today. If not, I’ll have to work on it on Sunday, and I really don’t want to, since it’s my only day off this week.
I’m off the pain killers now, and my neck doesn’t feel to bad. I’m still in a bit of pain, but managed to knit in the train on my way to University. I’m working on some socks (without a pattern). I also managed to finish the body of Montera yesterday. I casted on for the sleeves, but I’ve only done about 8 rows on them. Didn’t even finish the hem. I hope my pain doesn’t come back today, so I can knit on my way home as well. I really missed the knitting when I was in to much pain. (ok, it was only 2 days, but still)
Just a quick look in today. I am leaving soon to visit a friend for the day. She is a knitter also.
Ann: You are so welcome, the least I could do. Sending you
Carey: Hope Emily is feeling better.
Julie: You son will be fine, I think mother always worries more. Just make sure he knows that you will fetch him if he decides that he doesn’t want to stay.
Christine: Hope the sock is progressing well.
Emily: Good luck with the driving trip.
Lieke: Glad your neck is feeling betting.
Have a good day everyone. :knitting:
Julie, just try not to pass on your worry to him and he’ll be fine. We’ve had 2 sleepovers at our house and the worst we had to deal with was one little girl spending most of the night in my bed. Emily went to a couple and she did fine, too. Be prepared though, you may have to go get him in the middle of the night.
Lieke, good luck finishing up your work for today! I’m glad your neck is on the mend- hope you get more knitting done later.
Jess, we think you’re fabulous, I’m sure your friends do, too. I know what you mean about that niggling doubt, though. I hate that. Good luck with the driving, and have a great trip!
Hi Jackie, Sue, Christine, Dustina, Chris, oh, who have I forgotten?!
Ann, you are still in my prayers!
Thanks for all the well-wishes for Emily! She’s still a tiny bit sore, but doing pretty well.
As for me, we’re having dinner with some friends tonight at their house- they have a daughter Emily’s age who my girls LOVE to play with, so it should be fun. And, I don’t have to cook dinner!