This is my exact answer! It sounds like the school is opening itself up to MAJOR liability here, and that is pretty stupid.
Regardless, there is NO WAY I would let my 15 yo daughter go to another country without me. There are just too many situations she may get into that she is just simply not old/experienced enough to deal with.
Why don’t you come up with some options of things she CAN do over spring break? I know they won’t live up to a trip abroad where she could take advantage of unsuspecting adults, but if she’s trying to make you think that she’s into service, suggest some service opportunities closer to home - they’ll look just as good on her college applications. Maybe she can sort food at a food pantry, or help sort donations at the Salvation Army, or spend some time at a nursing home. Let her try to explain to you that she wasn’t quite so altruistic.
I think this is a great idea… and no… I would have to say NO!!
I would vote a big NEGATIVE on that idea with no questions asked. It has nothing to do with being culturally experienced or open minded it has everything to do with a 15 year old going to a country that the US puts on a travel alert with some half assed group thing not even sponsored by the school. Too many unanswered questions and too much of a risk.
I would vote a big NO with the rest of the crowd. Unless its something organized where you know there’s going to be enough adults there to watch over the kids. When I was a senior in high school my parents let me go with my friends to the Dominican Republic unsupervised. I payed for the trip all myself, but looking back I can’t believe our parents let four 17 year olds go off by themselves despite the fact that we were all good kids. We didn’t really do anything bad, but it was only a few years later when that girl disappeared in Aruba on a school trip! You just never know what could happen even if there are adults there.
Not a chance.
No. And I say that as a parent who did send his kids to Israel, one at age 17 so I’m no weenie as far as these things go. Its a matter of trust and obviously she isn’t prepared to deal with the world’s dangers at this point. I don’t envy you.
and thank you and thank you and thank you
I am on of those moms that has always told me kids “Listen, I am NOT being reasonable right now, s _______” and she thinks these ideas are good then gets exposed to something and cannot make good decisions and blames the stress of me controlling her life on her poor choices (yeah, I know, BS) but I seem to have spoiled her without realizing it, and it is making me feel REALLY bad abut myself as a mother (yeah I know I have not screwed up nearly as much as I have done well, but still…)
and yeah, I have a call into the school
ecb
I concur with everyone else that posted a no and thanks to whoever posted the State dept. I did a pro bono asylum case for a somali family but while I did that family another attorney had taken a case for a columbian family. It was not pretty. (a young teen escaped by herself after her parents were murdered in front of her) Columbia is not safe for its citizens, for the visitors OR NGOS (non Government organizations)
When the people that go there to help are getting kidnapped and raped it is not worth it for your daughter. And I’m hispanic so I don’t want anyone here to think i’m being offensive.
Kidnapping has become a VERY lucrative business there. its the side effect of the war on drugs. The war on drugs has worked to some extent. and this is the effect. and if you are american they think you are rich. and if you don’t pay they WILL kill the hostage. Its not worth the risk. they kill the educated class in columbia for the exact same reason. there is a huge business down there for bodyguards and kidnapping insurance.
Absolutely not. And its not that you don’t trust her-its that there are totally different rules out there and it is not safe for a 15 yo to be without parents.
In addition, there are many many people who go to resort types of areas during Spring Break specifically looking to target and exploit young girls. They lie and manipulate to gain trust. Unfortunately good people only see the best in others and that in itself would put a big ole target on her.
So, yeah, you are totally being bitchy, if by bitchy she means caring about her safety, loving her enough to protect her from things she may not understand yet and otherwise being a good, concerned parent. You meanie you! 
:
: 15 is such a hard age.
no, I wouldn’t let her go on that trip.
you are being a good responsible mom who is protecting her child. I know sometimes it’s hard to be in that situation, but you have life experience and wisdom that she doesn’t have. I have a 14 yr old who we are having a lot of trouble with due to his reactions to our rules, so I know what it’s like to be perceived as “mean”. hang in there ecb… she may not understand, agree, or appreciate it now, but someday she will.
I agree with this statement 100%. It has been said that as a parent it is your job to parent, not be a friend, buddy or pal. Kids are born with 2 parents and that is their shot in life.
Sometimes you end up parenting on your own and thats scary because there is no one to bounce ideas off of, to share in the fears and trials.
Kids feel invincable. The infallibality of youth is a heady thing and often overrides good judgement.
The long and short of it is that you have to love her enough to let her dislike your rules, you have to be consistant enough so that she can define a straight line for herself and you have to be strong enough to bend and not break when confronted with situations like these.
Raising good kids is easy. I know lots of childlike men in their 30’s. Its raising good adults that is the challenge.
ECB
When your 15 year starts screaming at you that you don’t trust her tell her its not her that you don’t trust but these crazy people. this is taken directly from the State department report on Columbia Dated June 21, 2007. Tell her that you love her too much to put her in danger and that if she wants to do a trip for humanitarian aid that she can go to New Orleans with Habitat for Humanity or come here to San Diego and help rebuild after the fires. (both these areas are tropical and beautiful during spring break)
Travel to Colombia can expose visitors to considerable risk. The Secretary of State has designated three Colombian groups – the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia (FARC), the National Liberation Army (ELN), and the United Self-Defense Forces of Colombia (AUC) – as Foreign Terrorist Organizations. These groups have carried out bombings and other attacks in and around major urban areas, including against civilian targets. Terrorist groups have also targeted critical infrastructure (e.g., water, oil, gas, and electricity), police and military facilities, public recreational areas, foreign-owned factories, and modes of transportation.
During the past four years, kidnapping and other violent crimes have decreased markedly in most urban areas, including Bogotá, Medellin, Barranquilla, and Cartagena. The level of violence in Cali, Buenaventura, and the surrounding areas remains high, largely as a result of the illicit drug trade. Colombia continues to have a high rate of kidnapping for ransom. The FARC continues to hold hostage three U.S. government contractors – all U.S. citizens – who were captured in February 2003 when their small plane went down in a remote area of Colombia.
Kidnap or murder victims in Colombia have included journalists, missionaries, scientists, human rights workers and businesspeople, as well as tourists and even small children. No one can be considered immune. Although the U.S. government places the highest priority on the safe recovery of American hostages, and the Colombian government has had some success with hostage-recovery teams, rescue capabilities are limited. Colombian law requires that private individuals coordinate efforts to free kidnap victims with the Colombian Office of Anti-Kidnapping (Ministerio de Defensa/Programa Para la Defensa de la Libertad Personal).
Official and personal travel by U.S. Embassy employees outside of most urban areas is subject to strict limitations and reviewed case by case. U.S. Embassy employees are allowed to travel by air, but inter- and intra-city bus transportation is off-limits to them.
The U.S. Embassy must approve in advance the official travel to Colombia of all U.S. government personnel. Such travel is approved only for essential business. Personal travel by U.S. military personnel to Colombia requires advance approval by the U.S. Embassy. Military personnel requesting permission for personal travel should contact the office of the Embassy’s Defense Attaché through the Embassy switchboard at 011-57-1-315-0811. Non-military employees of the U.S. Government do not need Embassy approval for private travel.
see full report at http://travel.state.gov/travel/cis_pa_tw/cis/cis_1090.html
Sounds like a blast, I’ll book my trip to Columbia tomorrow!:roll:
Seriously, who in their right mind would think it was even remotely ok to take a bunch of teenagers there? Where is this person’s mind?
Yea i just checked the Human Rights Watch Report on Columbia and its not any better. they attacked churches that housed the displaced people (refugees who homes were either destroyed or they chased out of the cities ) because the priests spoke out against the guerrillas. Half of those people were children. Never mind that Columbia is like 99% Catholic. so much for Thou shall not kill. I’m glad they listened during Sunday School.
these are sources that are used by attorneys when seeking asylum for refugees. They carry very heavily with the Immigration judges. and when someone is filing an asylum claim and you are doing your research this is exactly the type of report that makes your case sooo much easier well as long as your client wasn’t the aggressor.
There was a story that the during one asylum case in turn out the court translator who had been granted asylum previously lied and the person seeking asylum recognized him as the person who tortured them. can you imagine that??
My sister-in-law is from Columbia. Her entire family still lives there. Her father was kidnapped and held for ransom for over a month. They were finally able to raise the money and he was let go but he has never been the same person since. I have never been and do not plan on going, so I have not met them but this is not a place for teens to go to visit. Why did they pick this country… of all the places in the world they could have chosen, it seems so odd that they picked Columbia.
Wow they have the perfect asylum claim, though they should come to san diego as san diego has the highest asylum grants rates in the country and NY the lowest. (mostly because of an organization here that dedicates themselves to asylum, they are a wonderful organization. its who i did my pro bono work with)
Plus they can file a dual application for a family sponsorship. your husband is willing to do that. I’m assuming its your husband that’s related to her. that is soo horrible.
is there a facility there that he can get counseling for PTSD? There is an organization here and in NY called Survivors of Torture, where he can get free counseling.
I’m amazed that the school would let someone come in and organize a trip through them, especially to a place like Columbia. Someone needs their butt kicked.
First: is ColOmbia. Ok, I’m from Colombia and really, as sad as it sounds, I’ll never take my boyfriend to my country, why? It IS too dangerous for American people, [B][U]specially american people[/U][/B]! please, listen to this. I don’t know why someone would arrange a trip to Colombia with american teenagers. It is a dangerous but beautiful country.
As for traveling out of the country… well my parents used to send me to summer camps to germany, swiss, austria… since i was 12yo! And i love it, of course, it was a safe environment, with teachers and all we needed.
NO, NO, NO!
Sometimes as parents, we have to make unpopular decisions…
As the mother of 22 yo son and 11 yo (going on 21) daughter, my opinion is:
NO, NO, NO!