Right now the only person I wouldn’t knit for would be my dad’s girlfriend. My mom passed about 5 years ago and my dad has found this usually lovely woman and is on cloud nine. The reason I won’t knit or do anything else hand made for her is from past experience.
My daughter and I stayed with her during my brother’s wedding (one night). It was the first time we all met and I wanted to say thank you for letting us stay and welcome to the fold. I noticed that she had lots of really beautiful earrings and decided that I would make her a pair.
I made her a pair of really nice beaded earrings, made her a thank you card and sent it off. I’ve never recieved a word about either and I have seen her many times since then. So, I’ll knit for my dad but not for her.
I know we are supposed to give gifts without thought to getting back, but I think it’s only the polite thing to do to acknowlege a gift when it is given. She really is the only person I absolutely won’t knit for but I do tend to give knitted gifts to close friends. I knit quite a bit for charity and I know that is always needed and appreciated.
Another thought about all of this… I grew up in a crafty household. My Mom was always doing something crafty, mostly knitting. I think sometimes when that happens we can become jaded about it and not realize the skill that it takes. We just think, oh that, yeah, my Mom used to do that all the time. I think this especially if that person doesn’t take up the craft themselves. Just a thought…
I have a story. When I first learned to knit, my first project was a sampler scarf, 2nd was a felted bag, and 3rd was a gorgeous cable-knit sweater I made for my nephew, who was about a year old at the time. It had regular cables, horseshoe cables, popcorn stitch, moss stitch, etc. I did it in a nice sunny yellow yarn for him, as well as a matching hat. Well, his mom, my sister, asked me to make one for HER nephew (belonging to her SIL). So, I did, along w/ the hat, for my sis to give her SIL as a Christmas gift. I knit feverishly for several weeks and stayed up until about 4 am on Christmas morning sewing it up. Well, sis takes it to her sil, who apparently went nuts over it, loved it, etc. But, I never heard a word. She kept saying she was going to send me a picture of the kid in the sweater, but she never did. No picture, no thank you, no nothing. Needless to say I won’t ever be making anything for her again. The best part is that I did finally get a picture a few months ago, only of her 2nd child wearing the sweater, not the one it was made for. So, now I tend to only make things for me. hehe. :whistle:
This is starting to drive me nuts: Back in August DH realizes he needs a birthday gift for his Mom - in 2 days. He asks me if I have any extra socks he might give her. My first reaction is to say no, I’ve worn all the socks I’ve made, I have no unworrn ones. I say this not because it’s true (it isn’t) but because I have no plans to ever knit her anything. But after stewing over this a while, I realize I do have a pair of lion-ease socks that I’d recently finished and are really too small for me. MIL is a tiny little thing so they will likely fit her better then me. So I let him know I can accommodate him afterall, here, give her these. I never really get a thank you from her, but ok, I was really giving them to DH so I don’t let it bother me. too much.
Ths week, DH realzies he forgot his sister’s b-day - Mirl, you got some extra socks I can give her? So, I don’t care much for this SIL either, but I do happen to have just finished a pair that had originally been for me (who else!) then at DH’s request they were going to be for my sister for x-mas but since we don’t need them for her afterall, I relent that they can be his sister’s b-day gift. But they were originally knit for me and halfway thru for my sister - we both wear the same size 9.5 shoe size. DH’s sister is a little thing and only wears a 7 shoe if that. These socks really will not fit her. Well, I made a booga bag last year that is nice, not really something I’ll use (I want to make me a bigger one and different colors) so I suppose I will offer that to him to give her.
So I feel like DH thinks I’m the Walmart of sock knitting, one size fits all, always a pair in stock. I am not so sure that HE appreaciates the time and investment involved.
I made a baby blanket for one of my great neices when she was born, then a dress for her 1st birthday. I never got a thank you, but my sister reported that the baby blanket was in the dog’s basket and the dress is still in the bag/box it was sent in. My family does not like homemade gifts, but I’m knitting every one of them something small for Christmas anyway. Why?? Because I LOVE to knit. Whether they appreciate it or not, I don’t really care. It fills my time and is less expensive. I used to have a $10 rule, which got rather expensive since they keep having babies, now I can knit hats and scarves and mittens for half that… so I’m happy as can be, even if they all end up in the garbage[COLOR=black][I], [/I]because[I] I had fun doing it[/I]! [/COLOR]
Cell phone cozies: I used the pattern from Red Heart’s site. It’s #LW1539. Nice way to practice cables and seed stitch if you’re new, and it only takes three-quarters of an ounce of yarn. Oh, I just looked–there’s another one.
Some of these posts make me feel so sad. It’s such a shame many of you have people in your lives that are unappreciative toward your craft and ultimately…you.
right now I’m making little things for people…they still take time and such but they’re not time consuming stuff…I think the only person who I will knit something that I’ll really spend a long time making would be my mom. She’s so worth it and chokes herself up when I do. I think when you’re knitting something for someone you are sending love and you should receive some from them too
After nearly ruining one Christmas due to many late nights trying to finish long fingerless gloves (with a thumb of course) for all the ladies of my inner circle, countless matching socks for couples, scarves, shrugs and numerous baby clothes that last six months - and naff all back in return to match the hours of dedication and love… the answer to this question is that this is the year of me. All knitted goods for yours truly and no swine else.
WOW! I go to bed (17 hour time zone difference from the states) and wake up to 5 pages of messages. Thanks for responding.
Sunny-singer… I’m a teacher and I’ve helped many a child make adorable, and worthy of keeping Christmas ornaments… (I’m also an art teacher- along w/ being a classroom teacher) No thank you’s. You story makes me sad to hear…
Every year, that I’ve taught in the elementary as a classroom teacher… I’ve collected 2 family recipes from each child, added recipes from the school’s specialists/principals/etc, typed them, had each child illustrate their own recipe, (and also the guest recipes) xeroxed them, put them in a into a book… purchased quality card stock paper for the front and backs in bright colors, had a specially designed and colored front and back cover ‘laminated’ on the colored card stock…
PUT this all together with the ‘binder rings’ (like purchased cookbooks have) and then we all the xeroxing was done… the children would spend the week prior to Mother’s Day using crayons to color each black and white illustration for each recipe.
They are a treasured addition to my cookbook collection. HAVE I EVER, EVER RECIEVED A THANK YOU? IN about 10 years? NO… And, these are ‘real cookbooks’… I’ve sent additional copies to my own personal friends and they have also loved them.
Such a large amount of time and money went into each gift and not a thank you. It’s sad.
On another note–
I remembered another ‘unappreciated’ knitted gift. A good friend in the states had told me that her ‘very young’ son had gotten married and had their first baby a boy… so, when this child (who I had never met… nor had I met the mother of the child) was about 2. I knitted a great ‘crayon multi-colored tweedy’ yarn into a hat… and I knitted out of primary colors… icord snakes that I hand stitched here and there around the hat… so, the snakes were attached and not attached at the same time-- like they were crawling around the hat. Keep in mind-- the kid liked snakes, I hate snakes… but, this was a cute, cute hat.
I had made this prior to the movie: Snakes on a plane. I never ever received a thank you note from the family of the boy… (it was not the grandmother’s place to send me a thank you card- she had let me know by email that the kid did wear the hat and was the only one he would wear.)
I guess I shouldn’t have expected one anyway-- when they had gotten married a couple of years prior… I had sent a handpainted ‘Christmas cookie/dessert’ platter to them from Italy (where I was living) and not a thank you for that nice gift either.
Continue sharing your posts… it’s a good place to vent and others do understand here-- since we are knitters.
I just think that so much time and effort goes into making a knitted gift and i want the person who recieves it to know, so my knitted gifts are never surprises. Had an awful experience recently when I knitted my first pair of bootees for my sister in law’s baby, sent them along with a couple of other handmade things, from Aus to the UK they weren’t there when the postman knocked, the little calling card sat on the hall stand for 6 weeks before she went to pick it up, by which time it was gone (presumably returned to sender, although it hasn’t turned up here yet!) biggest problem is I am almost finished a lovely soft jumper for the baby for christmas and all work has ceased on that!!! I think I’ll give it to one of my local friends who’s seen me working on it at bitch and stitch group!
So far I’ve only knitted for DH, who’s always thrilled, and my grandmother who will also be thrilled. She’s like that.
But I’m remembering sitting at my bridal shower, surrounded by my mom’s friends (don’t ask where mine were, long story) and opening package after package of wall hangings and decorations and whatnot that just were. not. my. style. It’s one thing for somebody to be unappreciative of a gift they commissioned, or outright rude to your face, but darnit all, what do you do with the perfectly ugly, unwanted, two-generations before your time candy dish with poinsetta leaves all over it? Say Thank You very much and hope your mom has a use for it.
I don’t have many people so far who I won’t knit for ever. I do know I won’t make anything for my last boyfriend’s SIL. I took knitting to a family event and every two sentences she was calling me Granny and being insanely disrespectful. It’s a shame because she’s got the most adorable little girl who I would love to make something for, but I don’t want my knitting anywhere near the demon woman.
As for why I’d consider knitting for anyone in his family, we’re still best friends, and I really love his mum and sister. Z is also the kind of person who understands why I knit if not exactly how the knitting works, it’s about the same reason he loves his job. I know the mutual understanding guarantees appreciation from him for anything I make him.
I have a couple other friends that I’m hesitant to knit for simply because I can’t really afford to. They see stuff that I’ve made, like armwarmers and they immediately want something similar. I don’t think I’d make much for them without requiring compensation for the time.
I’m quoting myself because I see that what I wrote is ambiguous.
What I mean to say is, I knit things for others, but no one of them actually knows what it is to knit something, so it’s hard for them to fully appreciate it.
Hi Laura - this cozy was my maiden voyage into cables. If you haven’t done them, this is a perfect pattern to learn on, it is small and simple! I made the first one with the flap,per the pattern, but subsequent ones, I have left the flap off and I like them much better. I’m making a Christmas one now out of red wool with white fun fur (yep, the dreaded fun fur) trim. But, you can omit that. With the changes I made, it might look too much like the pattern you have, so be sure to look at their version!! Here’s a link to the pattern. I hope you like it as much as I do. I feel like a cable queen now!!
This is the first Christmas one I did:
Oh and I just recently got an email from my friend… that the ‘daughter-in-law’ and her only child (the son) is having another baby this spring… a girl…
Now, do you think that I’ll be knitting a hand-knit gift for this baby? Nope, I’ll mail something lightweight… (postage costs- mind you) that is store-bought.
