i just need a place to vent for a second, and i promise i’ll return back to my regular cheery happy go lucky self…
thanks in advance…
so for the past 2 years i’ve been living on edge because the company i work for keeps downsizing. they did mass layoffs 2 days before owen was born (helped kick start that labor) and i made that cut. i was so glad i could go on maternity leave and not worry about loosing my job. i came back from leave, and we’d slowed down even more, and were right back to use being 50% overstaffed…so after letting us all worry for months and months, they decided to close half of our offices, again, i kept my job. we took on a lot more work, and for a while we actually were busy! i was making overtime, and things felt a lot better. then the market dropped again, and our owning company put us up for sale. we’ve been treading water for the past 4 or 5 months, and the sale finally was announced last week…right before that, our manager had meetings saying the sale would be happening soon, and that layoffs were an almost definately possibility because it just made business sense.
without my income, we have to sell the house, somehow payoff all our loans and debts, and we still won’t have enough for us to pay for rent. then i get into that weird zone where daycare costs are so outrageous, that i’d have to make quite a bit of money for it to be worth it. unfortunately, there are no jobs in my industry out there anymore. everybody else is going through the same thing. all our competetor’s offices have closed or down to skeleton crews and aren’t highering. they’re all lucky if they make it through this slump. i’d basically have to start over again in another carrier, and i won’t make anywhere near the money i make now…
i’m so tired of stress. i’m so tired of worrying. i just want some stability. we’re at the point right now where we can’t rationalize fixing up our house or planting flowers or anything because we don’t know if we’ll have the house much longer…if i could do something from home for work, we’d be able to afford a decent apartment and wouldn’t have to move in with family. that’s our only hope right now…
blech. i’m just tired of this. i’m a big planner, and not knowing what is going on is killing me… i’m almost to the point where i’d welcome being fired just so i could get on with life and not have this hanging over my head all the time! i’d get to stay at home with owen. we wouldn’t have much money at all, but at least we would have a better idea of what to expect month to month…i know there are peoplle out there in muchworse situations then us…i just wish they’d rip the bandaid off, so to speak, so it would be done with!
blech… :verysad:
ok…i’m done. promise. thanks for listening.
end of vent! i feel much better!
