Funny stuff from your own kids

So I saw another post that mentioned something funny that a kid said. I was thinking, while I love those e-mails that pass around the internet, sometimes the things our own kids say are even funnier.

So post the funny things your kids said and did. I’ll start.

This weekend Little jr. decided he wanted to make S’mores (he saw a box of graham crackers with a picture of them). Anywhoo, he wanted to make some for daddy and “the neighbor baby”. I told him that we don’t have marshmallows at home but one of these days we’d go get some. He wanted to know if tomorrow is “one of these days”. I said “nope, we’ll have to go some other time”.

He looked at me (you could see the wheels turning in his head) and he says “Oh! I get it! marshmallows aren’t in season, so we have to wait!” I was trying not to laugh, as was the guy behind the counter. I explained that marshmallows don’t go in season. Only growing things go in season. To which he replied, “Oh, so you just don’t want to get them?!?” I said, “You got it in one.”

He then asked, “How do you know when things go in season? Do you get a chart when you turn 18? Or do you just start to learn that stuff?” I told him you just learn that stuff over the years.

He then announced that “Wow, there sure is a lot of stuff I still don’t know” (he just turned 7 a week and a half ago). I told him there is still stuff that Daddy and I don’t know. So the rest of the weekend when he would ask a question and Daddy or I would begin to answer, he would want us to qualify “Is that something you [I]KNOW[/I]? Or are you just [I]guessing[/I]?”

Gotta love 'em.


:roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard:

Reminds me of when my daughter stated… If you don’t want me to know… just tell me…

This was after my Mother & I would be talking in what we thought was a great cover, lol

When my niece was about 5 her whole family was going to go camping for the first time. She was planning what she would bring and said something like, make sure you leave room for my vanity table. My sister said, you can’t take that camping it’s too big. And my neice said, well, I can’t leave my beautification kit at home now can I.

They compromised with a small bag with her beautification supplies.

Ah yes, DD was eight at the time. We decided it was time to introduce her to someplace other than McDonalds. So, off we went to a semi classy restaurant. The hostess had seated us… when a small voice announced

I think you had better count the silverware when we leave. My mother has this pattern at home and I KNOW she doesnt have enough spoons because I keep hearing her say that. She has a big purse today, so youd better count before we leave.

Well, needless to say I crawled out of the restaurant with a really red face.

But wait, that`s not all…

Her son, now 8, who was five at the time was being good. We again (don`t learn, do I) decided that it was time he learned to eat in a REAL restaurant. So Grampa and I took him to a nice little sit down place that we know. He was good for half the meal, then he got bored. He started throwing his french fries on the floor. Then he would climb down to pick them up. I was getting annoyed because each time he tried to get back up, he nearly pulled the table over. I told him to sit and be good or he would have to go and sit in the car. He kept acting up. I am a mean Gramma. Out to the car he went.

On the way home it was very silent in the car. Then a little voice in the back said

Gramma, is Grampa mad at me… to which I replied Why would he be mad at you and he responded with Cuz I made a hell of a mess of that restaurant!

Gotta love the young ones!

Oh, I forgot. Little jr. this morning was washing his face. He dropped the wash cloth in the sink and I hear this cute little voice say “Damnit!”

I say “What did you say Little jr?” his response (before I’d even finished my question) “I didn’t know it was a bad word!”

Uhhhhh, ok?!?

:teehee: :teehee: :roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard:
It amazes me how children can say things that you think the would know nothing about. Children are just full of surprises. :blooby:

LOL-what a cutie!!

ETA-I just read all the stories-love it!!! Thanks everyone for sharing!

I have four kids, I should be able to think of something to add!! But I’m half asleep~ thanks for all the laughs~!

Last night I was tucking my son in bed and he asked me to read him a book…Of course, I did, then he read it back to me (a really simple book with pictures of animals and the name of the animal on the page)…After that, he wanted me to sing him a song, so I told him I’d sing him one song then he had to go to sleep…So, I sing the song and he says, “thank you, mama.” I said, “you’re welcome” and then he says to me, “you can leave now.” :roflhard: I could almost see him shooing me away as I walked out the door! Yeah, thanks for the dismissal, sir! HA

Letah75, you reminded me of a similiar situation that my parents tell me about. I was really little, probably preschool age, and I was doing something and watching tv. Well, I messed up whatever I was doing and said damnit. My parents tell me that they were more surprised that I actually said it in context to be really mad at me.

HA! I love these threads!!

The only one I can think of is about my brother. I am younger than him so I dont actually remember it but I have heard it a thousand times. We used to vaction to my grandmas house on christmas almost every year, my brother was probably 4-5. My uncle Pete was over at my grandmas house working on his truck in the garage. My brother was out there with my uncle and my dad. They decided they would have to call someone to fix it and so they were all coming inside. My brother ran ahead of them to get in the house and everyone was sitting at the table inside. My brother came in and says “Petes P**sed off” Needless to say he didnt get in trouble because they couldn’t stop laughing about it. :roflhard:

This is a very funny thread…

One day I was out with my older sister and her two children who at the time were 15 and 12. My nephew, the 12 year old, is severely mentally impaired, and speaks and comprehends at a preschool level, most people can’t understand him but because we’re around him all the time, we make things out.

Anyways, we were at the grocery store and they were out of something my sister needed that happened to be on sale. We went off to find any employee to check if there were anymore in the back. Needless to say the girl we found was quite rude and made a fuss when we asked her to look and when they didn’t have any, made a fuss that we asked for a rain check. By this time, my sister and I are both annoyed at the incompetence and rudeness of this girl and my 12 year old nephew is standing next to me. All of sudden, he looks up at me and says “She’s a bitch!” Thankfully, the girl didn’t understand what he said but my sister, my 15 year old niece and I could barely control our laughter for the rest of our interaction with her.

I love it when kids say things outloud in a store. I was with my niece one time, here mom had just gotten breast implants, and my niece was…oh…about 3 1/2. (We were at Michael’s, so there were mainly women shopping).

I was pushing her in the cart, now I am…eh hemm…well endowed…so my niece looks up and in a very LOUD and abnormally clear speech says, “When we leave can we go to the boob store?” I looked startled and said, “What?!?” She replied, “You know, where mommie got her new BIIIIIIG Boobies? Can we go there. My doll needs some boobs, and so do I.”

Needless to say, everyone turned around. And I swear Michael’s was abnormally busy that day. So everyone and their grandmother was looking at me (no doubt wondering if I was the mommie) and laughing. I just had to explain that they didn’t come from the store, and she would get her own one day, she didn’t have to buy them…Luckily, I’m not to easily embarrassed so I did get a good deal on yarn.

My sister is about 3 1/2 now, and this year she started day care. Well my mom is one of those people that likes to call things by their real name. So my sister was learning how to say a male and females private parts by their real name. Well she was in the day care when she calls one of the staff and asks quite loudly, "What’s my daddy’s gina called?"
I could not stop laughing! :roflhard:

LOL. love all these stories!

Mom likes to tell one about me from when I was 3 or so. We lived an a very small town that was predominately populated by white people. One day in the little grocery store a black man happened to pass us in the aisle. Mom swears I stood up in the cart with my eyes as big as saucers and LOUDLY told her to “Look at the big chocolate man!” Mom says he got a good laugh out of it and she explained that I should shake his hand and say hello.

I had something similar to that. My mom always told me that when I was about 4 or 5 we were walking down the street, I was skipping apparently singing “la la la la.” So we walk past a man who apparently was over weight and I said, “OOO, that’s a biggin! La la la la.” My mom still laughs at that… :roflhard:

Let me preface this by saying, I mean absolutely NO offense here!

My brother (older than me so I don’t remember this) was about 3 or so at the time. He heard the N word somewhere and repeated it. My parents explained to him that it’s a naughty word and he shouldn’t repeat it. A few days later they are out shopping and two black ladies walk by. My brother shouts out “Hey, look at those two naughty ladies.” Um, not the right thing to say! Needless to say, they had to explain the difference between naughty words to describe and the concept!


That is darling!

We like music a lot in this house, and all seem to have some solid tastes. My oldest son like heavy metal. My just turned 5 year old likes 70s/80s, namely Queen. So, when it’s time to clean house I turn on the music that gets them going. One day, we’d been cleaning house in the morning, and then went to Costco. Last thing on the list is Body Wash. As we head to that isle, dd asks, “mama, what are we getting?” and I say “Bodywash” Then she starts singing “Body language! Look at me, I got a case of body language!” Ok, I start turning red and trying to hush her :aww: and then she changes to the part of the song that goes “Don’t talk, don’t talk!” with her hand up just ever so perfectly at which point I just start laughing and so she continues, down the isle, with many a stranger casting disproving glances “Give me…your body…wash!” :roflhard:

many many years ago when my brother was about 4 or 5, the entire family was over at our house sitting out on the backporch. my aunt was holding my brother on her lap, right next to the back of the house, which was brick with tiny indents inbetween the bricks and cement. well, unnoticed by the rest of my family, my brother stuck his finger into one of the indents and pulled it back out, and it was covered by something white which turned out to be a spider nest. my brother, catching the attention of the rest of my family yelled happily, “OHH! PUDDING!” and went to stick his finger into his mouth. luckily my aunt has lightning reflexs and grabbed his hand before it actually met his mouth. but our entire family still likes to tease him about it. lol