Got this from a friend today. I had me :roflhard:!!!
>>> [SIZE=4][B]BANNED FROM WALMART[/B][/SIZE]
>>>
>>> This is hilarious!!!
>>>
>>> This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.
>>>
>>> DON’T TAKE ME IF I DON’T WANT TO GO…
>>>
>>> After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband
>>> accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.
>>>
>>> Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men–he found shopping
boring
>>> and preferred to get in and get out.
>>>
>>> Equally unfortunately, Mrs. Fenton was like most women–she loved to
>>> browse. One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her
>>local
>>> Wal-Mart.
>>>
>>> Dear Mrs. Fenton,
>>>
>>> Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
>>> commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be
>>> forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr.
>>> Fenton are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance
>>> cameras.
>>>
>>> 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in
>people’s
>>> carts when they weren’t looking.
>>>
>>> 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at
>>5-minute
>>> intervals.
>>>
>>> 3. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
>>voice,
>>> “Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away.”
>>>
>>> 4. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of
M&M’s
>>on
>>> layaway.
>>>
>>> 5. September 14: Moved a “CAUTION - WET FL OOR” sign to a carpeted
>>area.
>>>
>>> 6. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told
>>other
>>> shoppers he’d invite them in if they would bring pillows and
blankets
>>> from the bedding department.
>>>
>>> 7. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began
>>> crying and screamed, “Why can’t you people just leave me alone?”
>>>
>>> 8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
>>> mirror while he picked his nose.
>>>
>>> 9. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he
>>asked
>>> the clerk where the antidepressants were.
>>>
>>> 10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly
>>> humming the “Mission Impossible” theme.
>>>
>>> 11. December 6: In the auto department, he practiced his “Madonna
>>look”
>>> by using different sizes of funnels.
>>>
>>> 12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
>>through,
>>> yelled “PICK ME! PICK ME!”
>>>
>>> 13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
>>> assumed a fetal position and screamed “OH NO! IT’S THOSE VOICES
>>AGAIN!”
>>>
>>> And last, but not least …
>>>
>>> 14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
>>awhile,
>>> then yelled very loudly, “Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here!”
>>>
>>> Regards,
>>>
>>> >Walmart
:roflhard::roflhard::roflhard:
