I would go to the store and buy them for the five bucks. Tell her that if you couldn’t make them that cheap–and you’re sorry she’s in such financial straits!!

well i would hope she would understand what she has said after she buys the yarn for them and sees that even with the cheapest yarn it will cost at least half that price for them.

As far as how you deal with it, i suppose the best time to deal with it would have been right when she said it in a “well i can’t make them for that price” kinda way. As it is, i wouldn’t offer to make her anything anymore. However, I would think that she has probably told your niece that you are making them for her so i would go ahead and do it and just remember that your niece has nothing to do with your s-i-l’s inconsiderate comment.

umm…and yeah i would never make my s-i-l anything again if she said something like that. and i would do it in a way so that she knows that she is being singled out (but i am not a huge fan of my s-i-l so i may not be the best example! ;))

Tough one. Although I agree that if the child has already been told, it probably is a good idea to make the hat.

She’ll figure it out when she goes shopping & can’t find YARN for under 5 bucks per hat!

I would go to the store and buy them for the five bucks. Tell her that if you couldn’t make them that cheap–and you’re sorry she’s in such financial straits!!

OMG, Ingrid that is really, really good. I’d probably just knit the dn things b*hin’ all the time under my breath and feeling very put out.

A co-worker asked me to knit 4 cellphone cases for her; and then I caved when she wanted to pay me. Of course they only took a couple of hours and a different skein of yarn for each one. I guess I figured I could be (ruefully) generous. But people just don’t get it. I was thinking of doing scarves for Xmas for the women at work but wonder how they’ll be rececived. I really doubt that people value something like that. Maybe they’d be happier with a store-bought gift.

The older I get, the easier it is for me to say no. The sky hasn’t caved in yet!

I wonder why those who can…do… and those that can’t… think it’s cheaper for us to do for them?
I love to do favors for people, and a few times have done so begrudgingly. But those times I most likely bit off more than I could chew. But, they were happy with what I did and appreciative of it. But the people that take someone’s ability and translates that into your time being cheeper than the convenience of going to the store to buy it is not very nice.
You could make the hats, and then upon delivery… casually mention "Here they are… much much more well made than what you can buy in the store. If I made these for a store… I would charge X dollars for them because they’re worth it!"
And next time… say you are busy with other projects… that way, child is happy, mother hopefully rephrases her requests in the future :thumbsup:

I would happily knit them for the kids and if you can’t tell her how you feel, I think that a very carefully and thoughtfully worded card should be given to your SIL. Lether know that she REALLY hurt your feelings, that you knit for others for pleasure, but that there is a GREAT DEAL of talent that goes into knitting. Nevermind the fact that when one knits for another that love and caring for that individual also goes into each st that you knit. Tell her that you will go ahead with the knitting bc it’s for the kids & you wouldn’t dare dream of hurting their feelings when they are expecting something from you. Then, perhaps google around and find some prices of hand knit caps and show her the reality of the pricing. Perhaps offer a comparison with something that she does, let’s say she’s an accountant…ask if she would do your taxes…great, bc I don’t want to pay 10 bucks to get them done elsewhere; something to show her how it feels…in her world, to have something that she does diminished in such a way.
IMHO, I really think that you should let her know that your knitting is more than the worth that she off handedly applies to it.
My apologies for the rant…but, that’s just not right!!

I guess I’ve gotten a little bitter about knitting for other people because a woman at work asked me to knit a dress for her granddaughter and that she’d pay me. I thought I’d put her off by telling her to go pick out the yarn and pattern, but she kept saying how much she wanted it and she just couldn’t get to the yarn shop because of where she lived, and could she hire me to knit it , bla, bla, bla.

Well I went through patterns, brought in yarn from my stash, made the stupid dress, all the while expecting a fair price from her. I didn’t ask for an amount up front, because I was uncomfortable doing so. She loved the dress, asked for booties, and gave me. . . . are your ready for this. . . .
$15 a few weeks later in a Christmas card.

Then she had the nerve to ask me to knit a sweater for her grandson!! I put her off, because I was just too, too busy. Then I avoided her a lot. She retired in June, so I won’t have to face her again.

If I had just spoken up initially, I could have avoided all those bad feelings.

:shock: I canNOT believe that someone would have the NERVE to do that!! It would have been better if she had just not paid!! WHAT A DINK!! (I was nice… :wink: )

My feelings, exactly!

MAN! And a gal at work had to practically FORCE me to take 20 bucks for knitting a scarf for her daughter with yarn that she bought for me to work with… little things like that are simple favors for friends… but if I had someone ask me to do a batch for christmas presents… i’d have to put the break on somehow…

what a ultramaroon! lemme at 'em lemme attem!!! :evil:

I have learned my lesson with quilting on this, with a relative who “commissioned” a quilt…after I bought all the fabric, then CUT all the fabric, she went out and bought a bed in a bag. I think its just best to give things as gifts, people who dont do these kinds of things have no clue what kind of hours and dollars are involved.

When I’m knitting a gift, I enjoy it and look forward to giving it to the person. When I make something because I was asked to, or expected to, (except by the kids), I want to just get it done and over with. Then I worry that it’s not good enough. Nobody can complain that a gift isn’t good enough, but if they have expectations that aren’t met, everyone feels bad.

After the fiasco with the dress, a friend was telling another co-worker about it. She then asked me to make her a hat for her husband and would $30 be enough. That laid it out on the table, and a hat is quick, so I did it the next evening. Even then, although she approved the yarn I was using (alpaca), she said her husband didn’t like the smell.

Oh, well, take it up with the alpaca! ( I felt a little bit like I should make another one, but I’m not a store with a return policy.) I suggested she wash it, and since she didn’t say anything after that, I’m going to assume it was OK.

Thank you everyone! I really feel better now. I honestly love making things for other people…if they appreciate them. And I know she didn’t say it to be hurtful, she just doesn’t understand. So I think I will make 1 hat for my niece (she’s only 3-1/2 so if she was told about the hat, I think she has long since forgotten) and I’ll also mention that one of my mother’s friends asked me to knit a felted bag for her daughter and I just can’t do it, because I know she won’t appreciate the effort that goes into knitting, which is completely true. I think it’ll get my point across. I’ll give her the hat, tell her that’s all I had time for and offer to teach her to knit so she can make the 2nd one. And I’ll be very, very careful before I agree to knit for anyone again.

Man, Ingrid, I would have been so irritated to get $15 for all that work and yarn. Ugh!!!

Live and learn!