One of my daughter’s closest friend’s mother just found out she has colon cancer.
She will be having surgery on Tuesday to remove the left portion of her colon. I do not know how severe the cancer is, but I do know that this will be major surgery. We don’t know if she’ll have to have chemo afterwards.
Please keep her in your prayers. She’s a wonderful lady with two teenagers. Her name is Bea.
Now, a few questions.
I am not super, super close to her, but because of our kids being nearly the same age (the girls are in the same grade and several classes, the boys swim on their school team together), I don’t want to do anything to make her uncomfortable…ask too personal of questions, whatnot.
I did speak with her yesterday, and I have offered my chauffering services for her kids. We attend the same church and schools. Her mom will be staying with her for some time, so the cooking is taken care of (thank goodness, because my talents do not lie in this area).
I plan on sending flowers to her while she’s in the hospital…something to brighten her room.
I would like to knit her something too. If she has to go through chemo, I will be making her some hats, if she’s agreeable.
In the meantime, I’d like to know…what else can I do? Could I knit her something to have in the hospital for comfort…what does a person who has this kind of surgery need to make them more comfortable/less bored/etc?
Thanks all! I know that with so many members, we’ve all had different experiences in our lives. So, perhaps this is something you’ve gone through and can help me out with ideas.
My experience with cancer patients, my dh and a ds, is that they do want to talk but not necessarily about the cancer all the time. Talk about anything. Your children and what they are doing. You can always ask if they would like for you to do something for them or with them. I found that for some reason cancer scares people and they tend to shy away. And that is really sad because the cancer patient needs to have things as normal as possible. Hope this helps and I will be praying for your friend.
I’ve heard of people making ‘comfort blankets’ for someone who is ill…basically a big handcrafted ‘hug’ to curl up in while in bed or recuperating on the couch. Some folks repeat a prayer of wellness or comfort for the intended recipient while working on a comfort blanket. There is an aran afghan pattern I use whenever I want to make something big, soft and FAST (10-15 hours–usually I do it while in front of the TV in the evenings and have it done in a week).
It uses size 15 to 17 needles and 2 strands of worsted at a time (About 2500 yards worth) and makes an afghan about 45"x60". There’s a garter stitch border all around, 5 cables run up the length of it separating 4 panels with seed stitch diamonds.
Usually I make these in white and give a pair for wedding gifts, or make a much smaller version (size 10’s with a single strand of blue, pink or yellow) as a baby blanket, but I think it ought to work just as well as a comfort blanket for someone to take with them to the hospital for a homey touch, or to wrap up at home when not feeling well. Hope this fits the bill.
Forgot to mention that the pattern came from a Leisure Arts leaflet (lest anyone think I’m claiming it as an original pattern).
***Edit—EEEEEK!!!
Auburn, I’m sorry, I didn’t relize when I posted that pattern that I was violating copyright laws. Dustinac had to remove it to protect the site from any potential legal repercussions. I checked the LeisureArts site and they no longer offer that pattern, but I’m sure the coyrights are still valid. I hate that I got your appetite whetted/ put Dustina to the bother of straightening the mess out.
Substitute idea–my own this time. Simpler but nice–5 large cables on a simple seed stitch background.
Cast on 120
First and last 8 rows–seed stitch
Body…
First 4 stitches of each row–seed stitch
Cables—right side(p2,k4,p2), wrong side (k2,p4,k2), Crossing over every 8th row
Seed stitch panels in between cables 17 stitches wide.
Last 4 stitches–seed stitch.
Again, sorry for the major brainfart–the last thing I intended was to cause a potential problem for this site…I love it here!
I think just helping her with her kids will be a big comfort in itself. and bring her something to keep her occupied at the hospital. boredom at the hospital can be unbearable.
:think: After help with the kids and cooking, two things really got me thru when I was fighting breast cancer:
I had a person I just barely knew from church that sent me a note with a bad joke or story about her dog or else a postcard every week for that very long year — she always mailed it Monday am so it gave me something to look forward to on Wed.
I developed a love of old movies on dvd and audiobooks from the library that my husband picked up for me. You don’t have to concentrate or do anything, but you don’t feel like you’re all alone or someone has to entertain you either.
And don’t forget to ask how her husband and kids are doing…
She and her family are in my prayers. When going through a tough time, the best gift is a willing listener, whether over the phone or at the kitchen table over a cup of coffee. Sometimes it’s even easier to talk to someone we don’t know too well than it is to someone we’ve known well forever.
She and her family will be in my prayers!!!
I know this isn’t the same but last summer my Mom had a knee replacement surgery and was laid up most of the summer. One of her friends gave a beautiful small hydrangea plant. It was her absolute favorite thing she got. All the cut flowers died pretty quickly and we just had to compost them. We kept the hydrangea inside until it stopped blooming and then planted in the yard. Now it is twice the size and getting ready to bloom again. Every year when it blooms my Mom will remember that is the gift that Carol gave her after surgery. Another friend would just drop by to talk she would stay for a few minutes or a few hours depending on how Mom was feeling. We were both surprised by this because she and Mom had never really been all that close, they had known each other for years through us kids but never really beyond that.
As someone else mentioned cards always brighten up the mood.
[LEFT]
I’m going to make the comfort throw that CountryKitty suggested.
I think I will also get her a plant. My intentions were to get her flowers for her room, and although I do prefer fresh flowers, I think a plant is a better idea.
I’m also going to start sending her a card each week.
Wow! Y’all are so terrific! Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I will pray for Bea and her family. You are a good person to do this for her and I know she will appreciate it.
My DH had surgery last year to remove the junction between his small and large intestine (he has Crohn’s disease and had developed a small bowel obstruction) and it seemed that things to keep his spirits up and distract him from the pain worked well, so I like your idea of making something for comfort, sending something that means life (plants) and mailing her letters for distraction - you’re a great writer and very funny so I’m sure she will enjoy your kid stories and life observations in general.
God bless Bea, her family and your generous heart!
That yarn is really pretty, and I’m sure the blanket will be sort of like a prayer shawl for her - - you can knit prayers into each stitch as you go (and include a card telling her so!)
Knitting hugs & prayers for you both,
Karen G.
in GA
If you wouldn’t mind, post a photo when you are done with it so we can see it and those who pray can send their love and prayers along with it too. That way we can all convey a bit of love and support to her.
One of my friends has just past one year with Ovarian cancer, and it has been a tough year, but she never complains or shows it. There is a group of us who sew together. We made her a quilt which she loved because she used it for her chemo sessions and she shared all the squares with stories of who made what and so on. Anyway everyone steps over one another not sure what to do, so I offered to vacumn and wash floors once, she was so happy and the vacumn was hard with her stitches in the forward and back motion. I also make soups, I love making soups so was happy to have an excuse to make extra. Her husband owns a business is isnt home till late at night and she hasnt any children so the soup that is filling and easy on her belly and she doesnt have to cook or make a fuss in the kitchen. She told me she loved soup so I felt useful at least. I always feel like I dont know what I should be doing and tell her just ask and I can do what she needs but she never asks and I worry about that line between being a pest or being helping. I am shamefully one of those people that doesnt know what I should be doing or saying sometimes in these situations.
Nathalie, you are a wonderful friend, even if you don’t know her very well.
WHEN her mother goes home, step in with some soups or salads and maybe some really good bread. Also, if her yard starts looking shaggy, maybe you could get some guys from your church to help out with it.
Just a simple phone call made my day when I was side lined with various problems (including the cancer that I am now a ten year survivor of, praise God).
Does she knit or crochet? Simple projects can keep you from going bonkers after you’ve been home for awhile.
No, she doesn’t knit or crochet. She doesn’t even go on the computer. I’m thinking that I might rent some movies for her…maybe “Bring it On.” Wasn’t that a funny movie about cheer leading? She used to be a cheerleader, so I think she might enjoy it, if she hasn’t already seen it.
I was also thinking yesterday, after reading Knit4Fun’s comments, about maybe printing some of my funnier blog entries and putting them into a card each week. Laughter has been proven to have healing qualities (although I know that it’s the Lord who does the healing).
Auburn, I’m sorry, I didn’t relize when I posted that pattern that I was violating copyright laws. Dustinac had to remove it to protect the site from any potential legal repercussions. I checked the LeisureArts site and they no longer offer that pattern, but I’m sure the coyrights are still valid. I hate that I got your appetite whetted/ put Dustina to the bother of straightening the mess out.
Substitute idea–my own this time. Simpler but nice–5 large cables on a simple seed stitch background.
Cast on 120
First and last 8 rows–seed stitch
Body…
First 4 stitches of each row–seed stitch
Cables—right side(p2,k4,p2), wrong side (k2,p4,k2), Crossing over every 8th row
Seed stitch panels in between cables 17 stitches wide.
Last 4 stitches–seed stitch.
Again, sorry for the major brainfart–the last thing I intended was to cause a potential problem for this site…I love it here!
I hope I am not to late for sending my prayers to your children’s friends mother.
My girlfriend had called me to tell me that her brother’s daughter had just died. It was very sad she was only 22 years old.
So I wanted to send a shawl to both my girlfriend and her sister-in-law.
So I looked up prayer shawl on google. I found this wonderful site. I don’t know how to put it here but this is the url: www.shawlministry.com/prayer_page.html
It has so many prayers for different healings I think that everyone who needs to make a blanket or shawl will like this site.
Again I will have her and the family in my heart and prayers.
