Everyone has given you good advice. The best advice I ever got here was so simple, and I don't remember who told me, but it went something like this.
Once you get the needles loaded up and all the yarn untwisted LOL, lay the needles down flat on a table, and study it. Give it a good hard look, and it will click.
Worked for me, and I was ready to poke my eyes out with DPNs at the time, haven't put them down much after mastering them.
They are such a pain to learn, because they will not stay out of your way until you get about 4 to 5 rows in, and they made me nervous at first. Don't give up, just keep going.